In a Fix

On repairing rather than replacing that which no longer serves

The gift-giving season is behind is, and I hope it treated you well as both giver and recipient. Personally, I gave lots of books and received numerous pairs of socks—which is fine with me. Perhaps you’ve seen the meme claiming our happiness at receiving socks as a gift rises proportionally as we age…definitely a truism in my case.

After the excess of December, January leaves many of us in a purging state of mind. I’m on board with this—I cleaned out my sock drawer to make room for all those new pairs—but I’ve also been thinking a lot about what is worth keeping. Especially when it comes to anything that served us in the past, isn’t working so great anymore—but, given time and attention, has potential for years of additional service.

An example is a lovely necklace my husband gave me when our kids were small, featuring a parent’s arms, in silver, embracing three little pearls. For years, I wore that necklace almost daily, symbolizing love for my three kids.

Then a pearl fell off and went missing. (I’m not gonna speculate about the symbolism of that—which of my “pearls” felt suffocated and broke free from parental arms?)

Absent one pearl out of three, the necklace…isn’t the same? So I never wear it.

But here’s the thing. I don’t want a new, replacement necklace. What I want is a replacement pearl. Same size as the others, affixed firmly so it won’t fall off. (Might not hurt to reinforce those other two, while we’re at it.)

But getting that done? It means finding a jeweler, going in, explaining the issue, seeing if they can help. Leaving the necklace, going back for it when it’s repaired. This sounds simple—but it’s been years, and I haven’t done it.

So much in our lives, whether material or not, is like this. Things fall into disrepair, and fixing them requires time, energy, and commitment. Instead, things sit, ignored. Eventually, we might discard what’s broken, perhaps replacing with something new.

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What Does It Mean to Be “In a Fix”?

Now here’s a word with multiple meanings. According to Dictionary dot com, “fix” was “…first recorded in 1350–1400; (verb) Middle English fixen, from Middle French fixer or Medieval Latin fixāre, derivative of Latin fixus “fixed,” past participle of fīgere “to fasten.”

Turns out we have only been using “fix” to mean “repair” for the past two hundred years or so. And, of course, there are multiple other meanings of the word. Among others, you can be fixing to go somewhere, fixing up your new apartment, or heading out to find your dealer and get a fix (but please don’t).

In other words, “fix” is an oxymoron—sometimes making things better, sometimes indicating that things have worsened.

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Fixes Everywhere

Repairing that lovely necklace is one thing—a small thing that I don’t think about much. In contrast, other fixes keep me up at night. Perhaps you can relate.

Our national situation feels like we’re in a hopeless fix. Between the heartbreak of wildfires raging in southern California and the incoming administration in Washington, these “fixes” feel insurmountable—absolutely beyond repair. And on a personal level, I keep writing myself into corners in my work-in-progress.

It’s discouraging—and it’s tempting to consider giving up. I admit it: I’ve felt that way a lot lately.

So how do we turn it around? How to we transform our “fixes” into something we can actually fix? Where can we begin to make repairs?

“I am only one, but I am one; I cannot do everything, but I can do something.” — Edward Everett Hale

I think the keys are mindfulness, connection, and community-based involvement. This means signing up, stepping up, and putting myself out there. It means resisting the urge to doomscroll. It means appreciating the beauty of another day, the privilege of being alive. It means getting outside—even on a day like today, when I write from the Colorado mountains and the current temp is 4 degrees Fahrenheit.

Yep…it’s as cold out there as it looks.

I can’t put out the fires, but I’ve given to the Red Cross and World Central Kitchen for their relief efforts, as well as the Go Fund Me for a friend who, along with her family, lost their home. I can’t change the situation in Washington, but I can (and will) spend Martin Luther King Day participating in Denver’s MLK Day marade.

After the sudden, devastating loss of our German Shephard, Jojo, back in September, I’m happy to report that we’ve adopted Molly, a 2-year-old Corgi-cattle dog mix. Molly is the reason I’m heading out for a walk on this bright, freezing Colorado morning. I hope we’ll meet and greet dogs and people. I hope we’ll feel connection with the land, with one another, and with other souls.

I also hope that solutions for the conundrums in my WIP will come to me as I walk. They have a tendency to do that, so I’m optimistic.

Honestly, though, she doesn’t look like she wants to go anywhere.

Let’s inspire one another! How are you approaching your “fixes” and turning them into something you can fix?

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Audiobook Giveaway Winner (and a Copy Still Up for Grabs)

As mentioned in the last edition of The What If Journal, I’m giving a free audiobook of Anyone But Her to two subscribers. I’m happy to announce Scott Schaible as one of the winners—congrats, Scott, and enjoy! However, in randomly selecting winners, I’m sad to report that the other prize has gone unclaimed.

So let’s do this another way: if you’d like to win an audiobook copy of Anyone But Her, comment or drop me a line and let me know why. I’ll select a winner from the respondents. Good luck!

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Sending positive vibes your way—these days, I think we all need them. I hope that whatever fixes you’re struggling with, you remember your power, embrace your community, and affirm your commitment to uncovering a path to fixing them.